mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
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