oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
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