Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
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