I wish i was in the wii world.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize