my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
