Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
25 People Confess The Most Ignorant Thing Someone Has Ever Said To Them
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background