Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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