But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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