So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Randomize
