The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
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