I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
Randomize
