we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
