um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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