took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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