Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Randomize
