It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
