Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I've blown a few things in my day
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
