You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
