Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
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