Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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