I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
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