I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Randomize
