is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
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