Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
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