DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
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