Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
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