It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
