Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
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