and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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