Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
Randomize