Betty ford says i'm here all night
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
