He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
