im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
