i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
I love you.
Bad choice
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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