You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize