You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize
