sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
