dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
It's shark week go big or go home
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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