we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
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Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
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Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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