Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
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