Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
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