New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Randomize
