Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
