Midget sex pt 2 tonight
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
he just fucked me for my cheese..
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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