Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize