when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
