I'm lost and stupid without you.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Randomize
