What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Randomize
