my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
