Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize